About Me

Friday 6 February 2015

5 points that could win Team-India the 2015 cricket world cup!

Hi there,

With ICC cricket world cup 2015 around the corner, just thought of writing some pieces that formed in my mind.

I’m sure I’m not the only Indian who laughed at the Team-India promo for world cup with caption “won’t give it back”.  – Polite answer – as if someone is going to ask you to give the cup back. We ourselves are going to keep it there and come back without turning back.  Yes, Very optimistic.




So, as most of us saw the recent ODI’s that India played in Australia , it is evident that they are not quite in the boom-boom form which will guarantee them a place in the world cup quarter-finals. I thought they can work on a few areas which will help them, atleast outside the game.


    1. Men with beards:


It is very evident from history that men with long beards have all been very popular and wonderful at their work. Be it poet Vaali or fictional character Santa Claus, or Ex-prime minister Mr. Manmohan Singh. Cricket is not different these days. We have Hashim Amla in South Africa, Moeen Ali in England etc., So, we need to be having a similar guy in the Indian team – preferably an opener.

So, can some please tell Mr.Shikhar Dhawan to stop growing mustache, and start growing Beards ? It can probably help his footwork, if not technically, atleast  tactically! - dhaadi vecha dhawan, ada!

     2. Tattoo:


Well, Team India seem to have adopted this point, but only in the batting department (V.Kohli, M.Vijay etc.,). So, now when we see a Brendon McCullum, Kevin Peterson, we can be satisfied that we have a few in the team to match with. (But don’t ask me why Murali vijay – with a tattoo – in form of his life – is not in WC squad. Hell, I don’t know).

However, it is the bowling department that needs this. Look at Dale Steyn, Mitchell Johnson …forget about their bowling, they just look terror.  And look at our bowlers – Mr. B.Kumar – looks like he didn’t eat food for 3 weeks. (paeru vecheengle, Soru vecheengala’da ?) and Mr. Ishant sharma – when he runs up to bowl – it looks like if someone turns on a portable fan, he will fly back to India. They need to get some tattoo work done, (and probably Vadivelu style muscle like in movie Kadhalan ;-))
- this might work - If not technically, atleast Tattoo'ically!

      3. Spiked hair style:

Recently watched one bingo mad angle advertisement, where the guy puts some grains on his head and when the birds eat them, automatically a spike hair style is formed.

Reason I’m saying this – Most of the spiked hair style cricketers– like Steve Smith, Joe root are excellent fielders. We only have, again Mr. Virat Kohli, sometimes Mr. Raina.. not enough  - order one lorry of hair gels , we need 10 good fielders.  Give the first one to Mr. Ashwin (if he plays) for slip fielding.

People like Stuart Broad, Sunil Narine also sport spike-hairs and are great bowlers. So, maybe, Mr. Umesh Yadav & spring-hairstyled Mr. Jadeja can apply some of those gels too. They might get good swing or spin. Again - if not technically, atleast spike-hairly!

       4. Dancers:

Look at the west Indies team – whenever a wicket falls, or a six is hit, they all dance happily with simple good moves.  While their only problem is with their board and payment etc., - the players are highly talented. Like – Chris Gayle, Dwayne Bravo (who even danced in a Tamil movie), Pollard etc.,

The last dancer in our team was Mr. Shreesanth who , by-the-way, is still not 100% accused in spot –fixing. He will be raring to drop the towel and make dance moves on cricket pitches. Mr. Murali Vijay did some Caribbean style cameo dance appearances during some CSK matches, but then don’t again ask me why he is not in the squad – I don’t know yaaaa….

        5. Dhoni's signature-club-soda-master-mind-lucky-charm:

Like this Vaastu, Fengshui, Dhoni has his own brand – “lucky charm”
To be successful, you have to be different –That’s the excuse we have for bowling Mr.Joginder Sharma during that T20 finals last over. Whatever.
Sreeshanth – another lucky charm – was in the squad for 2011 WC, played first and last match , bowled 13 overs, gave 130 odd runs, no wickets. India won the cup!
But in this squad, I don’t see any one like that –may be is it Binny ? Or Ashwin ? well ,lets see.

I'm not a cricketer - so I cannot pin-point too much technical changes for the players, I can only write the above as a laymen cricket fan. But, in all, going by the above, its not going to cost a lot to get some aspects in our favor. 

Going by the current form of Team India, I honestly don’t expect them to win more than 2 matches in the tournament.

The below cartoon sums up the AS-IS status of 'wont give it back'.


Recently Misbah-ul-Haq was quoted saying – this time Pakistan will surely beat India.
A fan’s reply was – This is the weakest, out-of-form, out-of-sorts Indian team, in uncomfortable conditions that you will ever get to face. If you can’t beat India this time also, then you are really a horrible & waste team. - Pressure is off.

Fine then, lets see what this world cup has got to offer.  

I will be cheering for South Africa – very good team, talented , well settled team, but very very unlucky….. so far.!

See you later,

bye for now.

update on 28th March


Well, the world-cup 2015 is not over yet. But as India is not in it anymore, just thought of updating this blog. I must say that my anti-Jinx almost worked out !!  Just that i should have extended it to Kohli also.

The only problem was one Mr. Jadeja, who allegedly followed my blog and changed his hairstyle for the semi-finals and India lost. :-(

If someone had told in the beginning of the tournament that India would finish 3rd (SA lost to India, so being semifinalist, we will be No.3), any of us would have taken it blindly.

I don't think any Indian fan will complain of this performance, having won 7 games continuously, taking 70 wickets, setting a new benchmark. And those 70 wickets include 20 of Pakistan and South Africa - Wow!

As most of friends said,
If they win, we are happy that India Won.
If they lose, we don't care, as they are just a BCCI team and not even our national team!





1 comment:

Aravindh C said...

Lol... well said... only tattoos beards spikes can save india from current super skilled bunch :)